


Four Calling Nerds

by Foxleggs



Series: Answer the Call [4]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Blow Jobs, Christmas, Ghosts, Hand Jobs, M/M, Rimming, bitchy parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-26 05:48:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17136158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Foxleggs/pseuds/Foxleggs
Summary: Thor joins Loki's family for Christmas4 Calling Nerds3 Laufeysons2 Horny FoolsAnd...





	Four Calling Nerds

Loki needed to write.  


Seven long months of assuring his parents (and himself) that it did not matter that he was out of work because he was focusing on his writing and he still had fuck all to show for it.  


He had reams of notes, of course, they were all shoved into the various drawers of his new desk. Said desk had been an early Christmas present from Thor (delivered on the 20th and too big to possibly hide). Once it had been set up, Loki had taken to spending several unsuccessful hours a day sat at it.  


That was where he was now: elbows on the desk, head in his hands, fingers massaging his temples.  


What exactly had he been hoping for? To complete a first draft of a novel in a single day so he would have something to tell his family tomorrow when he went for Christmas Eve dinner?  


By the time Loki heard the van pulling up – the one Sif had bought to transport the gang’s ghost hunting/filming equipment - he was grateful for the distraction. He was even more grateful when he saw his gorgeous boyfriend step out. Then his gratitude took a nosedive as the other three occupants of the van also climbed out.  


It was not that Loki had a problem with the Girlfriends Three (he needed to stop calling them that in his head before he accidentally said it aloud), it was just that he was in no mood for visitors. Hopefully, this was just a flying visit.  


One whole hour later, the five of them were sat on the sofas drinking hot chocolate. The G3 showed no signs of leaving, Thor was threatening to breakout the Scrabble and, worst of all, Loki was actually having a nice time.  


Of course, it couldn’t last.  


Sif, sitting with her legs crossed, pointed her foot at Loki to attract his attention.  


“So, what’re you doing for Christmas?”  


“Going home.” His parents’ house wasn’t technically home anymore, but whatever. “We always have the big meal on Christmas Eve, so no one has to spend a big chunk of Christmas Day cooking. Then it’ll be presents first thing in the morning and then back to this place.” He gestured vaguely at the bungalow.  


Darcy perked up, bouncing in her seat. “Oo-oh, first Christmas with the in-laws! That’s a big step!”  


Loki and Thor exchanged an awkward glance.  


“Actually…” They said in unison. Startled, they both stopped. Then Loki took a long drink of his hot chocolate to avoid being the one who had to say it.  


Thor sighed. “I won’t be joining them.”  


The temperature dropped.  


“Do you have other plans?” Jane asked. Very loudly. To try to cover Darcy’s “Do they not like you?”  


“Erm, no. No other plans. I’ll just keep myself busy here until Loki gets back on Christmas Day.”  


“That’s awful!” Darcy sounded genuinely distressed.  


“Darcy,” Jane practically hissed her girlfriend’s name. “I’m sure that Thor would say if he wasn’t happy.”  


The terrible silence that descended proved that everyone knew that was bullshit. Three sets of brown eyes bored into Loki.  


Well, Loki was gonna have to fix this somehow. It had honestly never occurred to him that Thor would want to spend Christmas with a group of people he barely knew. He turned to his boyfriend.  


“Thor, do you want to come?”  


Thor shrugged. “It might be nice. I’ve only got to meet your family a couple of times and you’ve spent so much time with mine.” He turned to beam at the girlfriends’ three just in case there was any confusion as to who he’d meant.  


Loki witnessed the three discreet reactions from the corner of his eye: Darcy preened; Jane blushed; Sif gave a slight nod, which was probably equivalent to her bursting into tears of joy. Back over on his sofa, Thor was awaiting Loki’s reply.  


“Well, I’d better text my mom then.” He gave Thor what he hoped was a reassuring smile. “I’m sure they’d love to have you there. I should’ve asked in the first place, really; I need to remember that normal people actually like human interaction.”  


The chilly atmosphere melted. Loki tried to remember where he’d left his phone.  


Darcy cleared her throat. “Soooo, first Christmas with the in-laws! That’s a big step!”  


*  


Someone – Loki’s little sister, for a guess – had changed the doorbell to a jaunty Christmas tune that went on for far too long. And they were left waiting for the duration. Where the hell was everyone?  


Next to Loki, Thor shuffled his feet.  


“Should I be nervous? They like me, right?”  


“Sure they do.” Loki practically had his face pressed against the frosted glass. When he finally spied the blurred outline of someone coming to answer the door, he was struck with a wicked impulse.  


“By the way,” He said, standing back from the door so he didn’t look crazy, “My family doesn’t know about us, they think we’re just roommates.”  


He saw Thor’s eyes turn into saucers behind his glasses. “What-”  


“Shush, be cool.”  


The door finally opened. Loki’s sister, Helbindi, beamed at them.  


“Aw, my big brother finally stopped being embarrassed of his family long enough to bring his boyfriend home – it’s a Christmas miracle!”  


Loki did not miss the way that Thor’s eyes narrowed at him. He supposed he could expect some payback for that particular prank.  


“Piss off, Blindi, it’s freezing.” He shoved passed her. Thor followed behind.  


As they were faffing with their coats, Thor leaned in to Blindi.  


“Erm, are your parents all right with me coming at the last minute?”  


Blindi’s grin nearly cut her whole head in half. “Mom was fuming, she hasn’t shut up about it all day. It’s brilliant!”  


Loki could not help but smile at Thor’s dismayed little face. “Relax, she likes having something to moan about, that’s just how she is.”  


Thor still pouted. He kept it up until after he’d received genuinely warm greetings from Loki’s parents.  


Loki had timed it so they arrived when the food would be done, thus leaving minimal time for small talk. Unfortunately, there was plenty of time for small talk during the meal itself.  


“So, Thor,” Loki’s dad began, “Do _you _have a job, at least?”  
__

__Thor’s eyes darted over to Loki at the thinly-veiled jab. Loki made a ‘waving it off’ gesture that he hoped was subtle enough to go unnoticed by the rest of the table.  
_ _

__“I, erm… have a YouTube channel.”  
_ _

__The only response that elicited from Loki’s parents was a lot of blinking.  
_ _

__Thank fuck for Helblindi.  
_ _

__“Oh, some people make crazy money from that! There’s this whispering girl who makes, like, sixty grand a year.”  
_ _

__“Well, I don’t make anything like that kind of money.”  
_ _

__“Still more than Loki.” His mother muttered into her wine.  
_ _

__Thor, the darling, went on as though nothing had been said. “I have a decent-ish number of subscribers. It’s more now that I’m doing videos of actual investigations rather than just equipment reviews which is how I started out.”  
_ _

__Loki knew he was beaming but he could not help but be proud of Thor. It had been a delight to watch Thor work on something he was so passionate about (so much so that Loki had been able to stamp down a good 99% of his bitterness at not being able to do the same). He was proud of him for being able to make a living out of it. He still made an effort to get the mushy expression off his face before anyone else saw it.  
_ _

__“Investigations?” Blindi asked.  
_ _

__“Yeah, I’m a paranormal investigator.”  
_ _

__Blindi’s cutlery clattered onto her plate.  
_ _

__“O-M-G! Loki, have you told him about Greta?”  
_ _

__It took Loki a moment to place the name. When he did, he could have kicked himself for not anticipating this. He busied himself with his food, determined to have no part in any of the Greta nonsense. He did not miss the look that Thor gave him.  
_ _

__“No, he didn’t. Who was she?”  
_ _

__“She was this evil old woman who lived next door to us when we were kids. Used to shout vile stuff at us whenever we walked passed.”  
_ _

__“Oh, I’m sure she wasn’t evil.”  
_ _

__Bless Thor and his near-refusal to believe anything bad about anyone.  
_ _

__“She was.” That was all Loki was willing to say on the matter. He did not fancy a discussion about the homophobic bile Greta had spewed at him for years because he had once sat on her garden wall when he was ten. He was Not Getting Involved.  
_ _

__Thor raised an eyebrow at him but then turned back to Blindi for the rest of her story.  
_ _

__“I had one particularly awful encounter with her on the Christmas Eve when I was thirteen. Apparently, I was a nasty little slut for having pink hair. I called her an old bitch and ran into the house. Maybe it was the shock of someone talking back to her that finally killed her.  
_ _

__“At midnight that night, I woke up to see her standing at the end of my bed. She was screaming something at me but no sound came out. She was there for a few minutes, then vanished.  
_ _

__“A couple days into the new year, the police broke down her front door. They estimated that she died somewhere between Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.”  
_ _

__“Wow.” Thor’s eyes had got steadily wider the whole time that Blindi had been talking.  
_ _

__Blindi, for her part, was clearly enjoying having an audience. “And now she appears every year at the same time: midnight on Christmas Day.”  
_ _

__“Not that anyone else has ever seen her.” Loki had heard enough of that bullshit story for a lifetime.  
_ _

__His boyfriend and sister snapped their heads round to glare at him in perfect unison.  
_ _

__Blindi’s glare soon gave way to an evil little smile as she turned back to Thor. “That’s why I moved into Loki’s old room last month.”  
_ _

__It was Loki’s turn to drop his cutlery. “You what?” He turned to his parents. “She what?”  
_ _

__His mother rolled her eyes. “You moved out; it’s not your room anymore.”  
_ _

__He still felt hard done by somehow. “Tell me you moved my bed in there, at least; I’m not sleeping in Blindi’s old one.”  
_ _

__His dad shook his head. “We sold your old bed.”  
_ _

__“So, what the hell were you expecting us to sleep on tonight?”  
_ _

__“Your mattress is in there. The guy who bought your bed thought he was too good for a used mattress.”  
_ _

__The conversation took a sharp turn onto what items of furniture were okay to buy used.  
_ _

__Loki – still grumbling slightly about his old room being given away – turned to check that Thor was okay with sharing an old mattress on the floor of the box room.  
_ _

__Thor was vibrating in his chair. He looked like a dog who had just heard ‘Walkies!’  
_ _

__“Loki, we’re gonna see a ghost!”  
_ _

__*  
_ _

__The first thing Loki discovered about his temporary bedroom was that the bulb had gone. There were no spares in the house, so someone had dug out a lamp to shove in there. Once that was switched on, Loki could see just how much floorspace his old mattress took up in the tiny room.  
_ _

__It wasn’t the most magical Christmas Eve that Loki had ever had. At least Thor was enjoying himself.  
_ _

__Thor’s present concern was figuring out where Blindi’s bed had been. It had him lifting the mattress to look for impressions in the carpet.  
_ _

__“Do you have any idea if she moved her bed at any point? I’m trying to figure out if Greta was always in a fixed spot or if she could move around the room at will.”  
_ _

__“No idea.” When he saw Thor go to speak again, he added, “And you’re not bothering Blindi at this time of night to ask her.”  
_ _

__Thor pouted. “She might follow Blindi anyway, if it’s her she’s attached to.”  
_ _

__That would serve her right for stealing his room.  
_ _

__“Stop obsessing over your old room.”  
_ _

__Shit, had he said that out loud?  
_ _

__“It’s really obvious from your whole demeanour.”  
_ _

__Had he said _that _out loud?  
___ _

___Loki settled down onto the mattress before his boyfriend could read anymore of his thoughts.  
_ _ _

___In the absence of a clock, Thor set his phone against the wall where he could see it.  
_ _ _

___“Should I set an alarm for midnight?”  
_ _ _

___“Yeah, I’m sure that would go down well with the rest of my family. There’s only about thirty minutes to go, I’m sure we’ll manage to stay awake.”  
_ _ _

___Thor finally lay down next to Loki. “I’m just excited. Do you think we’ll get to see her? Should I say something to her if I do?”  
_ _ _

___“No! If she finds out you stayed up to see her, she won’t leave us any presents!”  
_ _ _

___Thor pulled a face. He leant forward and bumped his forehead against Loki’s shoulder before settling back on the pillow.  
_ _ _

___“I get it, I’m a child.”  
_ _ _

___“It’s sweet, really. How’d you wanna pass the time ’til the Anti-Santa shows up?”  
_ _ _

___Thor rolled onto his side. “Well… how do you feel about…” The hand gesture that he made was so vague that it could only possibly mean sex, “in your parents’ house?”  
_ _ _

___Loki snorted. “After the shit they pulled, I should have an orgy in here.”  
_ _ _

___“Right, close your eyes.”  
_ _ _

___He did so and listened as Thor rummaged around in his bag. Loki was going to be pretty impressed if he pulled an orgy out of there, even if he was too tired to participate.  
_ _ _

___After a long enough time that Loki was starting to worry that he was going to fall asleep, he was finally allowed to open his eyes.  
_ _ _

___Oh.  
_ _ _

___Apparently, he had fallen asleep and was set for a particularly spectacular dream.  
_ _ _

___There was Thor: kneeling on the mattress in knee-high, red and white striped socks; the red pants had a classy white lace trim; the Santa hat on his head was probably just the one from his old costume but it had certainly been given a new lease of life here. The best part was the pose that Thor struck: knees apart, one hand on his hip, the other hand held his glasses near his mouth. The end of one of the ear parts rested against his bottom lip, just slightly tugging it down. He was giving it his best Horny Secretary (or even Sexy Librarian).  
_ _ _

___Loki’s first (firstish) impulse was to make a crass joke. Unfortunately, there wasn’t nearly enough blood travelling to his brain for that. All he could do was stare at Thor open-mouthed.  
_ _ _

___Thor slid his glasses back into their rightful place. “What’cha think?”  
_ _ _

___Loki tried to force words out, then he gave up and nodded instead. It must have been enthusiastic enough to please Thor. He smiled and began to crawl up the mattress towards him.  
_ _ _

___Loki lay back wondering what he’d done to be put on Santa’s Extra-Special, Phenomenally Nice list this year. When Thor got close enough, Loki reached up to feel the muscles in his sides and back as he crawled. His hands slid down to the wonderful discovery that the pants were _entirely _lace at the back. That would have made quite the Christmas card.  
___ _ _

___Thor kissed him slow and long and deep. And Thor’s weight was on his chest and their hips were grinding together and why the hell didn’t Loki have magic powers that melted his clothes away with a single thought?  
_ _ _

___Thor pushed himself up just enough to slide a hand under Loki’s t-shirt. His palm was warm on Loki’s abdomen, it made his belly flutter.  
_ _ _

___“Low-key,” He called in a breathy whisper. “You’re overdressed.”  
_ _ _

___There wasn’t really a dignified way to scramble madly out of your clothes because you felt like your dick was about to explode, was there? At least Thor helped with his boxers, tossing them in a random direction.  
_ _ _

___Once Loki was naked, Thor sat up further to look him over. He placed his hand over Loki’s heart before running it down his flank and onto his leg. He gave his thigh a hearty squeeze.  
_ _ _

___“Yeah, you’ll do.” He removed his glasses and placed them by his phone.  
_ _ _

___“So, I think the name of the game is quick, quiet and with minimal clean up.” He nudged Loki’s legs apart to settle between them. “Which is a shame cuz I’d quite like to work you over well into the early hours of the morning.”  
_ _ _

___A grin spread across Loki’s face. “You’ll have to make it up to me when we get home, then.”  
_ _ _

___“Oh, I intend to.” Thor began his descent.  
_ _ _

___He began with a series of sweet little kisses around Loki’s belly button. This never failed to have him giggling and trying to curl up. Thor gave him a few seconds to recover before taking him into his mouth. He let the head rest against the roof of his mouth as he lavished the underside with his tongue. Then he took him down deeper whilst ghosting a hand over his balls.  
_ _ _

___Loki’s eyelids fluttered shut. His head thumped down onto the pillow. His hips thrust forward enough to make Thor gag and pull off.  
_ _ _

___He tried to sit up in order to apologise but Thor switched to jerking him off as he mouthed at his balls. If Loki could have formed any words at that point, sorry would have been fairly low on the list.  
_ _ _

___Thor nuzzled under his balls to swirl his tongue around his hole. Loki pumped up erratically into Thor’s fist.  
_ _ _

___Fuck, he was close. He nudged Thor with his foot to let him know.  
_ _ _

___Thor dutifully shot back up to swallow down Loki’s cock. He hummed as Loki spilled into his mouth.  
_ _ _

___Loki had never run a marathon before (because what was the bloody point of marathons?) but he imagined that this was what he would sound like if he did. He was pretty sure that his breathing was never this loud when they were at home and didn’t need to be quiet. Bloody typical.  
_ _ _

___When he looked down, Thor was resting his face in his hands and peering up at him.  
_ _ _

___“I didn’t wear you out, did I?”  
_ _ _

___Loki really could have done with several minutes rest, but he could not let that pass unchallenged.  
_ _ _

___“Get the fuck up here now.”  
_ _ _

___Thor’s awkward, eager stumbling certainly made Loki feel better about the mess he was currently in.  
_ _ _

___As Thor straddled his face, Loki marvelled at the strength of the lace knickers that were reigning in Thor’s straining cock. Thor certainly hadn’t gone for the cheap stuff.  
_ _ _

___Loki peeled the pants down just enough, then grabbed Thor’s hips and guided him into his mouth. He heard the slap of Thor’s palms as he caught himself on the wall behind Loki’s head.  
_ _ _

___With the familiar weight of Thor on his tongue, Loki relaxed and let his mouth be plundered. It left his hands free to do some plundering of their own. First, they took in the straining muscles of Thor’s thighs. Loki knew that they would start to tremble when he was close. He slipped his hands round to have another grope of the lace-covered arse. The muffled groan from above him told him that this was very much appreciated.  
_ _ _

___Loki slid his hands underneath the lace to tug the pants further down, exposing Thor’s bare backside to the cold air (not that it had had much cover before). He pulled one hand back to slip his middle finger into his mouth alongside Thor’s cock.  
_ _ _

___Thor’s strangled cry had Loki looking up at him.  
_ _ _

___It was quite the view: Thor peering down at him, eyes wide, hair falling around his face. Those thighs and biceps straining as they bore his weight. His glorious abdominals rising and falling.  
_ _ _

___Loki maintained eye contact the entire time as he slipped the finger out of his mouth. He watched Thor bite down on his lip as he felt around for his hole. When he slid his finger in, Thor threw his head back and thrust his hips forwards.  
_ _ _

___Loki took this as his cue to focus in on Thor’s cock. As he did so, his left hand went back to Thor’s thigh. _There _was the tell-tale trembling. He gave one last long suck and then Thor’s come flooded his mouth.  
___ _ _

___There was a THUD which Loki took to be Thor smacking his head off the wall. The poor thing.  
_ _ _

___He expected Thor to come in for cuddles then. Instead, he dropped down and picked up his phone. He moved it nearer and further from his face for a moment before giving up and putting his glasses back on. His face fell when he saw the time. He turned it to show Loki: 12:01.  
_ _ _

___Bloody Blindi, getting Thor’s hopes up like that. They’d be having words in the morning.  
_ _ _

___Thor nestled down against Loki’s chest. Loki squeezed his shoulders.  
_ _ _

___“Sorry, baby.”  
_ _ _

___Thor shrugged. “It’s fine, honestly. I’ve still had a nice night.”  
_ _ _

___“Nice?!”  
_ _ _

___Thor lifted his head enough to grin at him. “Sorry. I meant mind-blowing, obviously.”  
_ _ _

___“Obviously.”  
_ _ _

___Loki placed a kiss on his forehead and they settled down to sleep.  
_ _ _

___There was noise from the landing a moment later. A kind of yelp. Loki strained to listen but there was nothing else suspicious, just someone going to the bathroom.  
_ _ _

___He thought no more of it and went to sleep.  
_ _ _

___*  
_ _ _

___Loki was woken on Christmas morning by Thor returning from the bathroom. He had changed out of his Sexy Santa get up which was unforgivable. He did, however, provide Loki with minty-fresh morning kisses.  
_ _ _

___Thor climbed back into bed clearly hoping for morning cuddles, but Loki left him hanging in favour of diving for his bag. He had a special present for Thor that he wanted to give him in private.  
_ _ _

___He took a deep breath before handing over the bundle of papers.  
_ _ _

___“What’s this?”  
_ _ _

___Loki fidgeted with the corner of the blanket. “It’s a short story that I wrote for you for Christmas.”  
_ _ _

___“Aw, Lokes!”  
_ _ _

___Loki was pulled into a pleasantly suffocating cuddle. “I have got you a proper present as well, don’t worry.”  
_ _ _

___Thor released him. “This would be a good enough present on its own.”  
_ _ _

___“I wouldn’t let you get away with that.”  
_ _ _

___“I know.”  
_ _ _

___“You’d be sleeping in your car until the new year.”  
_ _ _

___“ _I know _. Can I read it now?”_____  


“You can but I’m not staying to watch. I wanna get in the bathroom before Blindi.”  


Loki got up, trying not to freak out at the sight of someone actually reading an actual thing that he had actually written. There was a decent chance of an anxiety-puke once he got to the bathroom.  


As Loki shut the bedroom door, he heard another one open behind him. Then a yelp exactly like the one he’d heard the night before. He turned to see a slightly shaken Blindi.  


“God, Loki, I thought you were her again.”  


“What?”  


“Greta, she was here on the landing last night.”  


Loki stepped closer. He lowered he voice lest Thor overhear them. “I thought she only appeared in your room?”  


“Usually, yeah, but this was nothing like the other times. She had her hand up by her neck like this, like she was clutching imaginary pearls. And her mouth was open in shock. Then she looked at me, shook her head, and disappeared. It was the weirdest thing. Should I ask Thor about it?”  


“No!” Loki knew he’d said it too forcefully. He tried his best to smooth it over. “I’ll ask him later.”  


Blindi shrugged. Then she ran to get to the bathroom before him.  


Loki could not bring himself to care about that. His brain was chewing on some very unpleasant thoughts.  


What might an evil, homophobic old woman see that would have her clutching her pearls and beating a hasty retreat?  


“Not again.” He muttered to himself.  


Not a-fucking-gain!

**Author's Note:**

> And A Traumatised Dead Lady! 
> 
> Merry Christmas x


End file.
